North Star Mental Fitness Blog

The Tiger Mindset

Tiger Woods has failed to maintain his elite status in the golfing world, since his return to the golfing circuit.  Mick Elliott at FANHOUSE called Tiger's current season his "winless season" in Mick's article "Tiger's Par-5 Game Still Isn't up to Par".

Tiger's golf game has been a disaster since his moral indiscretions and marital conflicts became big news. 

Mick showed how bad it has been for Tiger. "Ten times since 1997 Woods has finished in the top 10 on the PGA Tour on birdie-or-better conversions on par 5s. This year there are 53 players in front of his 43 percent conversion rate".

Tiger described his fall

Mindsets For Success

What motivates you?  What is your mindset?  Your mindset is important in every aspect of your life.

We have a very depressing economy.  The value of our property is depreciating due to the mortgage fiasco.  Many people are worried about maintaining their employment or have lost their employment.  Financial pressures magnify problems within marriages and families.

Your mindset determines your financial, interpersonal and psychological status in your life!  Today I would like to talk about three different mindsets.

When things go bad in life, many people often exercise the mindset of "not losing".  They seem to have a mindset that says "I don't want to lose".  Although this mindset may be appropriate at some times in our lives, it usually results in people becoming defensive and protective of themselves and their resources.  They try to hold on to what they have rather than increasing what they have.  They try to hold onto who they have been rather than growing and changing.  They are motivated to not lose rather than to win!

The second mindset is a mindset to win.  With this mindset a person is motivated and dedicated to win.  No matter how bad the circumstances are, this person is motivated to win at all costs.  You probably have heard the saying "when the going gets tough, the tough get going"!  With this mindset, people, often times, are obsessed with winning.  They view life as competition and they always have to win.  They seem to not enjoy what they accomplish and who they are.  They are devastated when they cannot win.

The third mindset is a mindset leading to self-actualization and growth.  Problems in living are perceived to be opportunities; opportunities for learning, changing and growing.  Dr. Alan Goldberg put it this way "You must let go of that obsessive need to win or beat others (which is actually limiting you) and instead focus on being the very best that YOU can be. Simply put you must make your goal improvement, NOT winning.

Steve Siebold writes about the differences in mindsets between the middle class and millionaires in his new book, How Rich People Think.   Steve wrote  "It's no mystery why 1% of Americans own 42% of the country's wealth. The good news is the rich are no smarter than the rest of us, they just think differently about money. The secret is to learn their thought processes, habits and philosophies and copy them. It's that simple, and this is what this book is all about."

In your relationships, are you:

1. Trying to not lose?
2. Trying to win?
3. Trying to grow and be yourself?

In your financial life, are you:

1. Trying to not lose?
2. Trying to win?
3. Trying to grow and be yourself?Remember,

Remember, We Live within the Relationship and Finances Created by Our Choices!

Dr. Hal

Life and Mental Fitness Coach

When Won'tpower Is Stronger Than Willpower

Cranky Fitness wrote about Willpower and Won'tpower.  Crabby McSlacker focused most on the failure to reach goals on the basis of willpower.  He insinuated that there is won'tpower. 

I sure like the idea that people have both willpower and won'tpower.  I know there is won'tpower.  Haven't you had run-ins with won'tpower!

Time and time again, we try to accomplish goals on the basis of willpower only to be thwarted by an insidious, constantly changing, unrecognized force called won'tpower by Crabby.

Crabby shared his own experience: "I actually do wonder if we have natural limits on our willpower, and can only tackle so many challenges at once. At least I observe this phenomenon in myself all the time. 
Anyone else find that if they're putting a lot of mental effort into one goal, the other stuff starts to slip?"

Can we all identify with Crabby's hypothesis "It's like there's a concrete amount of willpower in my psychological bank account. And if I try to write too many self-improvement checks? The damn things start bouncing."

Because of the difficulty with trying to solve life's problems on the basis of willpower, I created The North Star Mental Fitness Program.  I knew willpower was insufficient for completing self improvement projects.  I thought the willpower has to be made stronger.  I thought the solution must be multifaceted, more complicated, but still possible to obtain.

I liked the concept of mental fitness as it parallels physical fitness.  We all know that physical exercises can make people stronger.  So can mental exercises make people mentally strong enough to solve their problems or reach their goals. In the North Star Mental Fitness Program, there are 15 strategies or exercises for increasing the power in willpower or for giving us the tools for solving our problems and reaching our goals.

There are strategies for building one's focus, putting focus into action and keeping momentum soaring.  There are strategies for coping with frustration and turning won'tpower into willpower.

It does not work to try to beat won'tpower into submission by using willpower.  The harder you try to destroy won'tpower, the stronger it becomes.  Sometimes our unconscious mind specializes in won'tpower and fights against our conscious efforts to achieve self-fulfillment.  When won'tpower appears, it is much like an acting out, screaming child. It must be dealt with immediately. You cannot ignore a screaming child nor won'tpower. 

If you are not reaching their goals and solving your problems, get help for your won'tpower.

Remember, We Live within the Environment Created by Our Choices!

Dr. Hal

Life and Mental Fitness Coach

 

Enough Is Enough

When is enough enough?  We have experienced unimaginable bidding wars in the National Basketball Association for Lebron James and his cohorts.  The amount of money they have been offered is hard to fathom.  Even though Lebron James took less money to sign with the Miami Heat, he still settled for a king's ransom.

In contrast, I read an article by Sesn Conboy in the Pittsburgh Magazine.com about Lamarr Woodley.

Lamarr Woodley is a former football player at the University of Michigan and currently is a star linebacker for the Pittsburgh Steelers.  In 2009, he was a first-time Pro Bowler.  He made 25 sacks from his linebacker position in the last two years.

In this article,

Get Mentally Fit!

Take Care of You.  Take Control of Your Life.  Take Care of Your Mind.

Practice Mental Fitness.

Life is full of change, risks and challenges.  Mental fitness training will help  you find the strength and confidence to take care of yourself, even during turbulent times.  You can be stronger than your problems.  You can find solutions for any and all of your problems with the North Star Mental Fitness Program.

Are you mentally fit enough to deal with life’s ups and downs?"

At the North Star Mental Fitness Blog we believe everyone can improve their mental fitness.  We can all improve our mental fitness by concentrating and repeating mental exercises. 

If Your Life Is Important to You,

The Time Has Come for You to Add Mental Fitness to Your Life!

Just ask us how!

By practicing mental fitness, you will make a commitment to take care of yourself and you will have the strength to achieve your dreams and goals!

 

Remember, You Live within the Mind, Body and Environment Created by Your Choices!

 

Dr. Hal

Life and Mental Fitness Coach

 

Letting Go of Bad Behavior, Painful Emotions and Guilt

This weekend Tiger Woods has liberated himself from his separation from golf as he is playing in the Masters.  He has sought treatment for his bad behavior and undoubtedly to reduce his painful emotions and guilt.  Hopefully, he is liberated from his bad behavior, painful emotions and guilt.

I would expect that his golf game may reach new heights with the resolution of his devastating and draining painful emotions and guilt precipitated by his bad behavior.

The purpose of this post is not to discredit Tiger Woods.  The purpose of this post is to provide a plan for all of us to free ourselves from our bad behavior, painful emotions and guilt.  After all, haven't all of us had painful emotions and regrets following bad behavior?  Haven't we all struggle with letting go of problems in our lives?  Haven't we all struggled with letting go of painful emotions and guilt?

Here is a five step program for stopping bad behaviors, painful emotions and guilt.  I call this the L" System.

1.  Limit Your Losses:  This means to stop your bad behaviors.  Also stop thinking the thoughts and giving in to the feelings that rationalized your bad behavior.

2.  Learn:  Learn your bad behavior will always have negative consequences.  Learn your bad behavior will devastate those who care about you and those about whom you care.  Learn your bad behavior violates your values.  Learn that painful emotions and guilt are realistic, when you have engaged in bad behavior.

3.  Liberate Yourself:  After you have limited your losses and have really learned, then you are at the point that you can liberate yourself.  After you have accepted the realities triggered by your bad behavior, it is time to forgive yourself.  Real liberation comes from self forgiveness. Painful emotions and guilt willl remain as long as you are continuing to engage in bad behaviors. Painful emotions and guilt will continue to occupy your mind until you have forgiven yourself.

4.  Letting Go: As you fill your conscious mind with thoughts of self forgiveness, it becomes easier to let go of your bad behaviors, painful emotions and guilt.  Letting go is a conscious choice that is really possible after you've gone through the first three stages.  Letting Go is also fostered by recognizing, making amends and seeking forgiveness from those who have hurt.

 5.  Look Forward: The temptations and negative thinking that generated your past bad behavior must be dealt with in the future.  Once you have gone through this program of acceptance and forgiveness, you can look forward with confidence and determination.  You can have confidence in your learning, forgiveness and determination to avoid bad behaviors.  You can perceive past situations where you engaged in bad behavior as opportunities to strengthen your new behaviors, your enjoyable feelings and peace of mind.

I hope that these five steps will help you find freedom from bad behaviors, painful emotions and guilt.

Remember, You Live within the Environment Created by Your Choices!

Dr. Hal

Life and Mental Fitness Coach

 

 

Mental Fitness & Obama Healthcare

Today there will be a historic vote regarding the Obama Healthcare Bill.  This bill will have monumental effects as it will redefine the nature of our democracy and further increase the national debt.  Of course, the healthcare bill will also affect each and every American.

For a few moments let us focus off of the bill and think about the representatives who may or may not be voting on a bill that still could be passed without a vote.  I must ask the question.

DO YOU THINK THAT OUR REPRESENTATIVES ARE MENTALLY FIT ENOUGH TO CAST A VOTE ON THE OBAMA HEALTHCARE BILL?

Of course, whether they are mentally fit or not; our Representatives are taking up space in Washington and will at least "present" when the vote is taken or should be taken.

If our Representatives are mentally fit, they will

1. Be focused on representing the people; not focused on party allegiance, pursuing their individual agendas and giving in to the influence of the President or any other important person.

2. Act courageously to represent the people.

3.  Claim their self-respect and success in representing the people rather than pursuing the approval of their party.  Success is representing the people and completing their mission in representing the people.  Success is not determine by the passage or failure to pass a health care bill.

4. Accept all of the frustrations necessary to represent the people and all of the frustrations necessary to fight the influences from those who wish to discount the will of the people, while courageously and persistently representing the people.

5.  Avoid all self-defeating rationalizations and actions that will betray the trust of the people.  Blind allegiance to a party and childlike dependency and cowardice cannot be rationalized in any way.

6.  Make your decision on the basis of American values and moral values.  Is your decision really best for America and the people.  Will the people you represent be happy, peaceful, free and in control of their lives following your representation of them?

7.  Make your decision on the basis of rational and logical thought.  Be honest.  Don't try to convince us that 30 million people will be additionally insured for no additional cost.  Don't try to convince us that Medicare benefits will not be cut.

8.  Relate to the people with honesty, respect, acceptance and trust.  Violate any of these values and you are not welcome to represent us any longer.

9.  Don't underestimate the people.  We want to take care of ourselves, our families and our democracy. Do not attempt to destroy our ability to take care of ourselves!  Do not destroy our ability to take care of our families!  Do not destroy our country!  Remember, taxation without representation led to the birth of America. 

10.  Check your position.  Are you representing the people?  You may have wavered.  You may have succumbed to pressure.  You may have betrayed the public.  Now is the time to get it right.  Choose to represent the people before you vote!

 

REMEMBER, WE WILL LIVE IN THE COUNTRY DETERMINED BY THE CHOICES OF OUR REPRESENTATIVES!

FOR THE REPRESENTATIVES, YOU WILL LIVE WITHIN THE COUNTRY DETERMINED BY OUR CHOICES AFTER YOU HAVE MADE YOUR VOTE!

Dr. Hal

Life and Mental Fitness Coach

Our Super Bowl & Our Time for a Revolution

Today is Super Bowl Sunday.  Millions of Americans will be riveted in front of their TVs as they watch the New Orleans Saints battle the Indianapolis Colts.

Today I also woke up to an article about Sarah Palin, who delivered a speech last night and claimed that "America is ready for a another revolution".

As I thought about these two epic events,

We Are Proud Americans

We are proud Americans!  We are proud to be Americans!  We are not ashamed of our country!  We cherish and value our constitution, democratic heritage, values and country.  We are proud of the American people, who have actively expressed ourselves throughout the last few years. 

Our courageous determination to confront our government regarding the government's insensitivity to the interests of the American public was recognized by Scott Brown.  Scott Brown is not the hero, although he must be recognized for his willingness to listen and represent the American public.  This is what we want in our elected officials.

The hero is the American public.  We focused, we have acted and we are celebrating our successes!  We are taking back our power!  We are not blindly dependent upon our elected officials anymore.  No longer can we assume that our representatives are doing what is best for America and the American public. 

We are accountable for whom we elect.  We will hold those whom we elect accountable for representing us.  We now know that we have to be on guard, aware, critically evaluating, and actively communicating our beliefs and opinions to those who are elected to represent us and govern us.

We are willing to do whatever is necessary as American people in order to ensure that the American public is represented in Congress, governmental agencies and the White House.  We understand that we can no longer be complacent.

We must be willing to continue the fight until we get rid of all of the representatives, policies and governmental decisions that defiantly reject the will of the people.  We must continue the fight to be Americans and reject the arrogant who believe we are not smart enough to know what we want and, therefore, want to tell us what is best for us.

Michelle Obama has been criticized for her statement for the first time in my adult life I am proud of my country because it feels like hope is finally making a comeback".  She was criticized for saying that it was the "first time" she was proud of her country.  I disagree with her "first time" statement, but I agree with much of what she said .

Today, I agree with Michelle's statement "it feels like hope is finally making a comeback".  Michelle Obama also stated "People in this country are ready for change and hungry for a different kind of politics".  This statement is true today. 

The change we want is not a change in political party.  It is not a matter of Democrats versus Republicans.  We want our elected officials to continue to listen to us after they are like elected.  We want our opinions to be valued.  We want our elected officials to not violate the Constitution.  We want to be free!

Remember, We Live within the Government Created by Our Choices!

Dr. Hal

Life and Mental Fitness Coach

Living New Year's Resolutions

As we approach the beginning of another New Year, you can turn New Year's Resolutions into Successes with a mental fitness procedure. 

Most people fail in keeping their resolutions because of lack of focus, weak commitment and insufficient will power. 

Successfully, reach your New Year's goals by using The Power Choice from the North Star Mental Fitness Program.  You do not need will power to be successful.

From a mental fitness perspective, there are three necessary steps for success.