North Star Mental Fitness Blog

Our Super Bowl & Our Time for a Revolution

Today is Super Bowl Sunday.  Millions of Americans will be riveted in front of their TVs as they watch the New Orleans Saints battle the Indianapolis Colts.

Today I also woke up to an article about Sarah Palin, who delivered a speech last night and claimed that "America is ready for a another revolution".

As I thought about these two epic events,

Another Tour de France Winner Overcomes Illness To Win

First it was Lance Armstrong.  He overcame cancer and unbelievably won the Tour de France seven times.

Now it is Alberto Contador's turn.  Four years ago his career was in doubt, because of brain hemorrhage.  He has now won the Tour de France for the second time, since his brain hemorrhage.

Both Lance and Alberto are shiny lights for all of us, who have had medical setbacks in our lives.  Both men have achieved beyond most people's imagination rather than being depressed or defeated by their illnesses.

Both men show the importance of living one's dream and not allowing illness to take away our dreams.

Lance and Alberto have shown us the importance of courageously overcoming our illnesses and living our dreams.

Remember, We Live within the Environment Created by Our Choices!

Dr. Hal

Life and Mental Fitness Coach

Mental Fitness & Lance Armstrong

Lance Armstrong has won the Tour de France seven times.  This year he came out of a four-year retirement and finished third.  Armstrong has no regrets regarding his performance.

Armstrong is a winner.  This is what he said about his third-place finish.

“I have no regrets. I wouldn’t change anything about my performance, the tactics, about the preparation. I’m happy with that. For me it’s a healthy result, healthy in the sense that in my life, in my previous career, if you would have said ‘You’re going to get third,’ I would have been on fire. So to now be third and to be proud of that, and my kids to be proud of that, the fans, and the people of France. Everybody loves that. It’s a good thing.”

Armstrong's attitude about finishing third reflects his good mental fitness.  Sometimes when we give it our best we will not finish first.  We need to feel happy and proud about doing our best.

We need to evaluate ourselves on the basis of how well we do in our own eyes rather than on the basis of being number one.  We do not have to excel and be number one in order to feel successful and like ourselves.

Soriano and the Slumping Cubs

The Chicago Cubs have become synonymous with "slumping", "choking", and "pressing".  All terms used to describe mental thought processes that create a loser's mindset, loss of momentum and underachievement.

Carrie Muskat /  MLB.com wrote a very relevant post entitled "Slumping Soriano aims to clear his mind".  In this article Carrie interviewed Soriano, who concluded "Sometimes, you can think too much. Alfonso Soriano says that may be what's happening to him lately."

For many people who are "stuck" and have lost their momentum in life, they sometimes think too much.  Usually, however, the problem is not that they are thinking too much.

The problem is that they are thinking "wrong thoughts".  As is the case with Soriano, there is a realistic basis to some of his "wrong thinking".  Thinking is "wrong" when it programs our minds for failure and underachievement.

Let us look at Soriano's hitting this year.  In fact, we can look at most of the Cubs hitters such as M. Bradley, M. Fontenot, K. Fukudome, G. Soto, A. Miles, R. Johnson, A. Blanco, A. Ramirez and K. Hill.  All of these hitters are slumping and have been slumping almost the entire season so far.

According to Soriano, he has never struggled for this long.  In June his batting average was below 200.  Obviously this is not acceptable to him or any major league hitter.  Soriano told Carrie he needs to "clean" his mind.  He is so right!

Soriano admitted that "I worry".  Again a realistic response to hitting below 200 for entire month, but the "wrong" way to think if you want to be successful major league hitter.

Soriano expressed his dilemma.  He believes physically he is playing his game as well as he has in the past. 

Soriano stated "his swing looks the same now as it did last year and two years ago. He isn't changing his bat, or switching routines, or trying to find the right pregame egg salad sandwich. One good thing is that Soriano is healthy physically."

What has gone wrong?  It's how he has been thinking about his abysmal performance!

Two mistakes are evident in his thinking.

1. He has been thinking to avoid being hurt rather than maximizing his functioning. "I've been working hard to not get hurt get hurt this year."  Playing to not get hurt will result in under achievement.
2. Soriano is allowing his "poor hitting performance" to control his mind rather than allowing his "good hitting thinking" to determine his performance. Soriano said. "I'm not hurt physically, but I'm hurt mentally because I'm not hitting well."

From a mental fitness perspective we cannot allow our performance and especially our past blunders in performance to determine how we think about ourselves.  As the case with the Chicago Cubs, their failure to hit results in self-doubt, worry, anxiety, pressing, or choking.  Filling their minds with these thoughts certainly will kill momentum and guarantee under performance.

If you want to break a "slump" or stop "pressing", change how you think!  Don't allow your under performance to determine how you think.  No matter how bad your performance has been, detach your thinking from your poor performances.  Focus your thinking on your identity as a successful person and focus on playing within your ability.

Remember, Professional Baseball Hitters Live within the Environment Created by Their Thinking about Their Hitting.

Remember, We Live within the Environment Created by Our Choices!

 

Dr. Hal

 

Life and Mental Fitness Coach

Successful Teenagers

Michael Jordan was motivated to elevate his performance continually to higher levels.  I want to tell you about three teenagers, who also have had high aspirations and recently achieved great successes.  All three teenagers showed remarkable ability to focus and achieve their goals.

When Chalonda Goodman was six years old, she was enthralled with Michael Johnson's successes in the World Olympics.  She also was mesmerized by the athletes in the 1996 Olympics in Atlanta, Georgia. 

She told her father "I want to do that". 

Stuart Kantor wrote "A passion ensued, fueled by an innate desire to run faster than any girl lined up next to her". As a result of her ability to focus and work towards her dream, she graduated from high school with 8 state titles in track.

High school senior, Bryce Lamb, triple jumped farther than any high schooler in the nation.  He also set a state record in his home state. 

He began his track career at the age of five. "I quit the first practice," Lamb recalled. "It was too hard. I was walking to the car and I told my mom, 'I don't ever want to do this again.'  At the age of six, Bryce began training.

Bryce has set his goal to participate in the 2012 Olympics. "It's always been in my mind, and it's possible now," he said.

Stuart Kantor also wrote about a teenager, Bonnie Richardson, who lives in a small Texas town of less than 600 people.  Her school did not even have a track program.  Twice Bonnie has accomplished the unbelievable.  By herself, she has won two state team track championships in the state of Texas.

All of these teenagers show the importance of good mental fitness as expressed in their persistent motivation to excel in their athletic endeavors.  They courageously remained on target to reach their goals and avoided all distractions that would interfered with achieving their goals.  Undoubtedly, they overcame many obstacles in order to become successful.

We can learn a lot from these teenagers.  We can learn to set our dreams and courageously work toward achieving our dreams even when external circumstances are bleak, limiting and discouraging.

Remember, We Live within the Environment Created by Our Choices!

Dr. Hal

Life and Mental Fitness Coach

The Legacy of Legendary Basketball Coach Chuck Daly

At age 78, Chuck Daly died.  He will be remembered as one of the best basketball coaches in the history of the sport.  He led the "US Dream Team" to a gold medal in the 1992 Olympics.  He led the Detroit Pistons, who were known as the "Bad Boys", to 2 NBA championships.  Although he will be remembered as a very successful coach, his wish to be remembered as a "nice guy" will never die.

Coach Daly's coaching philosophy evolved from being strict, demanding perfection and "playing by the book".  He realized he needed to know his players before he could teach what he wanted them to know.

The Daily News wrote:  "Unlike most coaches, who are first-degree control freaks, Daly never stole the spotlight. Like any good boss, Daly always trusted his talent, and knew his guys would find a way to win".

 Dave Dye, New Staff Writer, wrote an interesting article regarding the evolution in Chuck Daly's coaching.  Although the article appeared on October 18, 1985, it is very enlightening regarding the secret of Coach Daly success.

Dave Dye wrote:

But not always did this adaptability come so naturally. Daly recalls many moments during the beginning of his coaching career at Punxsutawney (Pa.) High School when he exhibited more of a Bob Knight tough-guy demeanor than his own easy-going style that's made him so popular and successful within the NBA circle. "To be honest, that's probably one of the biggest things I had to overcome," said Daly, whose team opens the regular season Oct. 25 against Milwaukee at the Silverdome.

"You're constantly fighting your own ego. That was one of the hardest things for me. In high school, I was very, very strict. I thought I had to be the hard guy. If one of the kids didn't play aggressively one day, I'd make him wear a towel around himself the next. It looked like a dress, and it told him he was a sissy.

"I learned over the years, though, and I became more open-minded. I remember when I was a (biology) teacher. I used to be so organized and strict in taking attendance. And I did everything straight out of the book. I thought that was being such a good teacher. At the same school, there was another guy who was really laid-back. It didn't seem like he was doing anything. He told them stories and there didn't seem to be any control in the class. At least compared to some of our classes. But we found out later he was the best teacher. The kids related to him better and did the work. I think that opened up my eyes quite a bit.

Daly's coaching philosophy has been based on that criteria. Vince Lombardi would shudder, but Daly is more or less one of the guys. At practices, he often jokes around. He can be seen practicing imaginary golf shots or trying to bounce a basketball off the floor into the hoop.

"In this business a lot of people get treated badly," said Piston Vinnie Johnson. "It means something when you know there's a guy you can trust. Some coaches are afraid to get involved with that type of relationship. They feel the players may take advantage of them then. They have to try to scare you into doing things. But that's not how it works here."

Said Thomas: "We do more for him because of that. He's helped me with things off the court. You don't forget that when you're out there."

Unlike many coaches, Daly doesn't see getting close to his players as a dangerous practice. "This is such a long grind, there are many nights they don't have to play (hard)," he said. "You better be a reason for them to do that. Anyhow, I'm not as nice as everybody always says. I put my foot down when I have to. But I just see no reason why there has to be a constant conflict if you can avoid it."

All of us can learn from Coach Daly regarding the psychology of relationship-based success.  We can apply his coaching philosophy in parenting, business and family relationships.

We will miss Chuck Daly.  We will remain appreciative of his successes and what he has taught us.

Jim Abbott An Example of Hope for People with Disabilities

"Jim Abbott was born without fingers on his right hand, but it never stopped him from fulfilling his dreams-dreams far out of the reach of most people" wrote John U. Bacon in Michigan Today.

"Lucky Man" was the title of John U. Bacon's article on Jim Abbott.  I'm sure most people would not describe a person with no fingers on the right hand as lucky.  It wasn't what Jim Abbott accomplished in spite of his disability that probably led Mr. Bacon to describe Jim Abbott as "lucky".  Jim Abbott was lucky because he was able to help so many people and motivate people with and without disabilities.

Let me make it very clear:  Jim Abbott is not an example of luck.  Quite the contrary, he is an example of hope for people with disabilities who are determined, confident and motivated to succeed.  Jim Abbott's accomplishments were because of his mental and physical fitness.  Jim Abbott was able to become successful in spite of his disability, when others probably would have given up or probably never would have even tried to be successful.

Even in grade school he never made a big deal out of his disability.  He was a pitcher throughout his career.  He learned to pitch with his left hand, put his glove on his left hand, catch the ball with his left hand, put his glove under his right arm, let the ball fall into his left hand and throw out a runner.  Jim recalled that this was not something he had to master, "it was just something I did".

Jim's accomplishments included:

1. Pitching for the University of Michigan baseball team,


2. Big Ten player of the year,


3. Big Ten male athlete of the year,


4. Sullivan Award for the nation's best amateur athlete,


5. Won the Gold Medal game at the 1988 Olympics,


6. Drafted in the first round by the California Angels,


7. Pitched a no-hitter against the Yankees,


8. A 10 year career in the major leagues, and


9. Retirement of his baseball number at the University of Michigan.

Jim's message:   "I want to be remembered not for having to overcome anything, but for making the most of what God gave me. If there wasn't some ability, and with that, some accountability, I'd probably just be remembered solely as the guy who pitched in the majors with no right hand."   

Isn't this a message that is good for all of us.  Aren't we accountable for doing the most with the abilities we have been given.

Burn the Boats

Queme los barcos," or "Burn the Boats, because defeat is not an option".

Hernando Cortes was a conquistador and explorer who sailed to the New World in attempt to find treasure.  Many great leaders had failed before Hernando came along.  Hernando trained his soldiers during the day and built their morale at night.

When the time came for fighting and accomplishing their goal, Hernando told his men to burn their boats.  He went on to emphasize that defeat and retreat were not options.  He reassured his men and challenged them to be victorious.  Following their victory he reasoned, they would sail back in the enemy's boats.

Recently the University of Michigan's basketball team surprised many by beating Minnesota on their home floor.  This victory was necessary in order to enter the big dance at the end of the season.  Coach Beilein challenged the team by talking about burning the boats, because defeat was not an option.

This quote was mentioned in an article by CJ Lee, senior guard, in an article entitled Court Vision with C.J. Lee: Live Life without Regrets. 

From a mental fitness perspective, C.J. Lee understands what it takes to be victorious.  It takes a total commitment to your goal and the belief that failure and defeat are not options. 

Remember, We Live within the Environment Created by Our Choices!

Dr. Hal

Life and Mental Fitness Coach

 

CURSE OR POOR MENTAL FITNESS

The Chicago Cubs again failed in their pursuit of becoming World Series champions.  Now it is over 100 years of falling short of their goal.  A lot has been written about the curse.

Is the underachieving Cub's failure to perform the result of a curse?  Or is their propensity for losing indicative of poor mental fitness?

I believe that the Cub's failure to achieve is because of poor mental fitness.  How else can you explain nine straight losses in post-season play?  The Chicago Cubs were the best team in the NL in terms of scoring runners in scoring position during the regular season.  How can you explain their failure to score more than two runs on average in six games over a two-year period?  How can you explain the extremely sloppy play from a team that was first in victories during the season?

Poor mental fitness is characterized by loss of momentum.  The Chicago Cubs lost momentum for winning prior to the beginning of the post-season play.  They rested their players and held tryouts for a reliever for post-season play.  There could be many other reasons why they lost their momentum.  For some momentum is created by winning and success. 

For champions momentum is the result of confidence derived by empowered thinking associated with mental fitness training and is not determined by winning and playing well.  Champions learn to maintain their momentum even when they play poorly and loose.

When players have poor mental fitness, momentum can be destroyed by playing poorly or losing.  Teams that have good mental fitness training, can maintain momentum even when they lose or play poorly.  The Chicago Cubs failed to show momentum in the playoffs following their wonderful season.

Poor mental fitness also results in problems with confidence.  False confidence and lack of confidence are symptomatic of players or teams with poor mental fitness.  The Chicago Cubs played with a lack of confidence, emotion and determination.

It is important to realize that momentum and confidence are not determined by our external accomplishments or determined by circumstances like the wind blows a kite.  No matter how bad our circumstances are and no matter how successful we've been in the past, it is important to live in the present.  We need to think about ourselves and our circumstances in a way that will generate momentum and confidence. 

Without momentum and confidence, playing poorly is to be expected.  For all of us, momentum and confidence are necessary for achieving success in the benefits of success in our lives.

Remember, We Live within the Environment Created by Our Circumstances!

Dr. Hal

Life and Mental Fitness Coach

How to Be a Star in Your Relationships

Magic Johnson was a basketball star by any one's standards.  He was a star on his high school and college teams, which were championship teams.  He was selected first in the 1979 NBA by the Los Angeles Lakers.  This was a very wise choice as Magic helped his team win a championship in his first year of professional basketball.  He won the MVP award for the finals that year.  Over his career he was the star on five NBA championship teams.  To read about more of his accomplishments, read the article on Magic from Wikipedia.

Magic valued his team members and team.  He realized that to win, he needed to bring out the best in his teammates.  Being the star, one would expect that he wanted his teammates to do what was ever necessary to make him a bigger star.

Wrong!  Magic did not expect or want his teammates to focus on bringing out Magic's talents and skills.  Instead Magic realized and believed that his goal was to help his teammates reach their potential and refine their skills.

Magic applied Pres. John F. Kennedy's famous lines from President Kennedy's January 20, 1961 Inaugural Address.

Magic's wisdom was expressed in these powerful words as written by Pat Riley's in his book, "The Winner Within".

"Ask not what your teammates can do for you.  Ask what you can do for your teammates."

Let's apply these words to our personal relationships.  After all, Pat Riley emphasized the importance of the family, when he wrote "the first and most important team in anyone's life is their family".

For husbands who want to be a star in their relationship, Ask not what your wife can do for you.  Ask what you can do for your wife.

For wives who want to be a star in their relationship, Ask not what your husband can do for you.  Ask what you can do for your husband.

It is very difficult, but important to step outside of our selfishness.  Too often we limit ourselves to expecting our spouse's job is to make our lives better and help us become more successful.  Too often we expect our spouses to live up to our expectations, satisfy our needs and achieve our goals. We expect our spouses to be our supporting cast.

One of the 50 greatest NBA players, Magic has a lot to teach us about teams and teamwork.  No matter how good or gifted we are in our relationship, our goal is not to be self-centered and demand attention.  Instead Magic gives us the secret of a satisfying, electrifying and victorious team. 

The secret is to encourage and help our partners achieve their goals and potential.  Our focus should be to bring out the best in our partners.  Our goal is to be empathetic and encouraging rather than critical.  Our goal is to be loving and empowering rather than judgmental.  Our goal is to be grateful rather than demanding.

Are you willing to commit to Magic's philosophy regarding successful teams?  Are you willing to enable your spouse to be the star for the well-being of your spouse and the team?

Remember, We Live within the Relationships Created by Our Choices!

Dr. Hal

Life and Mental Fitness Coach