North Star Mental Fitness Blog

Mindsets For Success

What motivates you?  What is your mindset?  Your mindset is important in every aspect of your life.

We have a very depressing economy.  The value of our property is depreciating due to the mortgage fiasco.  Many people are worried about maintaining their employment or have lost their employment.  Financial pressures magnify problems within marriages and families.

Your mindset determines your financial, interpersonal and psychological status in your life!  Today I would like to talk about three different mindsets.

When things go bad in life, many people often exercise the mindset of "not losing".  They seem to have a mindset that says "I don't want to lose".  Although this mindset may be appropriate at some times in our lives, it usually results in people becoming defensive and protective of themselves and their resources.  They try to hold on to what they have rather than increasing what they have.  They try to hold onto who they have been rather than growing and changing.  They are motivated to not lose rather than to win!

The second mindset is a mindset to win.  With this mindset a person is motivated and dedicated to win.  No matter how bad the circumstances are, this person is motivated to win at all costs.  You probably have heard the saying "when the going gets tough, the tough get going"!  With this mindset, people, often times, are obsessed with winning.  They view life as competition and they always have to win.  They seem to not enjoy what they accomplish and who they are.  They are devastated when they cannot win.

The third mindset is a mindset leading to self-actualization and growth.  Problems in living are perceived to be opportunities; opportunities for learning, changing and growing.  Dr. Alan Goldberg put it this way "You must let go of that obsessive need to win or beat others (which is actually limiting you) and instead focus on being the very best that YOU can be. Simply put you must make your goal improvement, NOT winning.

Steve Siebold writes about the differences in mindsets between the middle class and millionaires in his new book, How Rich People Think.   Steve wrote  "It's no mystery why 1% of Americans own 42% of the country's wealth. The good news is the rich are no smarter than the rest of us, they just think differently about money. The secret is to learn their thought processes, habits and philosophies and copy them. It's that simple, and this is what this book is all about."

In your relationships, are you:

1. Trying to not lose?
2. Trying to win?
3. Trying to grow and be yourself?

In your financial life, are you:

1. Trying to not lose?
2. Trying to win?
3. Trying to grow and be yourself?Remember,

Remember, We Live within the Relationship and Finances Created by Our Choices!

Dr. Hal

Life and Mental Fitness Coach

When Won'tpower Is Stronger Than Willpower

Cranky Fitness wrote about Willpower and Won'tpower.  Crabby McSlacker focused most on the failure to reach goals on the basis of willpower.  He insinuated that there is won'tpower. 

I sure like the idea that people have both willpower and won'tpower.  I know there is won'tpower.  Haven't you had run-ins with won'tpower!

Time and time again, we try to accomplish goals on the basis of willpower only to be thwarted by an insidious, constantly changing, unrecognized force called won'tpower by Crabby.

Crabby shared his own experience: "I actually do wonder if we have natural limits on our willpower, and can only tackle so many challenges at once. At least I observe this phenomenon in myself all the time. 
Anyone else find that if they're putting a lot of mental effort into one goal, the other stuff starts to slip?"

Can we all identify with Crabby's hypothesis "It's like there's a concrete amount of willpower in my psychological bank account. And if I try to write too many self-improvement checks? The damn things start bouncing."

Because of the difficulty with trying to solve life's problems on the basis of willpower, I created The North Star Mental Fitness Program.  I knew willpower was insufficient for completing self improvement projects.  I thought the willpower has to be made stronger.  I thought the solution must be multifaceted, more complicated, but still possible to obtain.

I liked the concept of mental fitness as it parallels physical fitness.  We all know that physical exercises can make people stronger.  So can mental exercises make people mentally strong enough to solve their problems or reach their goals. In the North Star Mental Fitness Program, there are 15 strategies or exercises for increasing the power in willpower or for giving us the tools for solving our problems and reaching our goals.

There are strategies for building one's focus, putting focus into action and keeping momentum soaring.  There are strategies for coping with frustration and turning won'tpower into willpower.

It does not work to try to beat won'tpower into submission by using willpower.  The harder you try to destroy won'tpower, the stronger it becomes.  Sometimes our unconscious mind specializes in won'tpower and fights against our conscious efforts to achieve self-fulfillment.  When won'tpower appears, it is much like an acting out, screaming child. It must be dealt with immediately. You cannot ignore a screaming child nor won'tpower. 

If you are not reaching their goals and solving your problems, get help for your won'tpower.

Remember, We Live within the Environment Created by Our Choices!

Dr. Hal

Life and Mental Fitness Coach

 

Tarkenton Still Scrambling in His Senior Years

Fran Tarkenton is still known as the elite scrambling quarterback.  If he didn't beat his opponent with his passing, he did it with his running.  Now in his senior years,

Automatic Negative Thoughts are called ANTS by Dr. Amen. 

Unfortunately, most of us never question our thoughts, so we don't know we have ANTS.  We never entertain the idea that our thoughts could be misleading or self-defeating.  Since we never question our thoughts, our Automatic Negative Thoughts even though negative, are completely accepted as the truth. 

Unchallenged Automatic Negative Thoughts determine how we feel, how we behave and how we relate in our relationships.  Unchallenged Automatic Negative Thoughts destroy our confidence and turn potential successes into failures.  Most dreams are destroyed by unchallenged Automatic Negative Thoughts.

Automatic Negative Thoughts are lies!  Our minds lie to us, when we have Automatic Negative Thoughts!  If our Automatic Negative Thoughts are lies, then stop believing them!

What are your automatic negative thoughts?  It is important for you to identify your automatic negative thoughts, because these ANTS can create temporary or permanent discomfort and dysfunction in your life.

Here are some ANTS that you might have:

• I will never be successful.
• I cannot have a loving, caring and lasting relationship.
• I cannot pass any test.
• I will never be able to lose weight.
• I always disappoint myself, parents, spouses and children.  He
• I will never be secure.
• I can never please anyone.
• I will never be healthy again.
• I am too old to do anything.
• I am always discriminated against.
• I am always rejected and demeaned by others.
• I am controlled by others.

These are just a few examples of ANTS.  Identify your ANTS and destroy them!  Replace your ANTS with positive and empowering thoughts.  Practice these thoughts frequently.

Remember, We Live within the Identity and Environment Created by Our Mindsets!

Dr. Hal

Life and Mental Fitness Coach

Mental Fitness & Obama Healthcare

Today there will be a historic vote regarding the Obama Healthcare Bill.  This bill will have monumental effects as it will redefine the nature of our democracy and further increase the national debt.  Of course, the healthcare bill will also affect each and every American.

For a few moments let us focus off of the bill and think about the representatives who may or may not be voting on a bill that still could be passed without a vote.  I must ask the question.

DO YOU THINK THAT OUR REPRESENTATIVES ARE MENTALLY FIT ENOUGH TO CAST A VOTE ON THE OBAMA HEALTHCARE BILL?

Of course, whether they are mentally fit or not; our Representatives are taking up space in Washington and will at least "present" when the vote is taken or should be taken.

If our Representatives are mentally fit, they will

1. Be focused on representing the people; not focused on party allegiance, pursuing their individual agendas and giving in to the influence of the President or any other important person.

2. Act courageously to represent the people.

3.  Claim their self-respect and success in representing the people rather than pursuing the approval of their party.  Success is representing the people and completing their mission in representing the people.  Success is not determine by the passage or failure to pass a health care bill.

4. Accept all of the frustrations necessary to represent the people and all of the frustrations necessary to fight the influences from those who wish to discount the will of the people, while courageously and persistently representing the people.

5.  Avoid all self-defeating rationalizations and actions that will betray the trust of the people.  Blind allegiance to a party and childlike dependency and cowardice cannot be rationalized in any way.

6.  Make your decision on the basis of American values and moral values.  Is your decision really best for America and the people.  Will the people you represent be happy, peaceful, free and in control of their lives following your representation of them?

7.  Make your decision on the basis of rational and logical thought.  Be honest.  Don't try to convince us that 30 million people will be additionally insured for no additional cost.  Don't try to convince us that Medicare benefits will not be cut.

8.  Relate to the people with honesty, respect, acceptance and trust.  Violate any of these values and you are not welcome to represent us any longer.

9.  Don't underestimate the people.  We want to take care of ourselves, our families and our democracy. Do not attempt to destroy our ability to take care of ourselves!  Do not destroy our ability to take care of our families!  Do not destroy our country!  Remember, taxation without representation led to the birth of America. 

10.  Check your position.  Are you representing the people?  You may have wavered.  You may have succumbed to pressure.  You may have betrayed the public.  Now is the time to get it right.  Choose to represent the people before you vote!

 

REMEMBER, WE WILL LIVE IN THE COUNTRY DETERMINED BY THE CHOICES OF OUR REPRESENTATIVES!

FOR THE REPRESENTATIVES, YOU WILL LIVE WITHIN THE COUNTRY DETERMINED BY OUR CHOICES AFTER YOU HAVE MADE YOUR VOTE!

Dr. Hal

Life and Mental Fitness Coach

The Power of Acceptance

There is power in acceptance! 

Tiger Woods: Addiction And Mental Fitness

This last week Tiger Woods made his public apology regarding his sexual infidelities or sexual addiction. 

Debate has raged over whether he has a sexual addiction or

15 TOOLS FOR SUCCESS IN 2010

SUCCESS = TAKING GOOD CARE OF YOU

If you take good care of you in 2010, you will be successful!  The following 15 tools will help you be successful in any situation in 2010.  These 15 tools provide the resources to guide you through 2010.

 

THE 15 MENTAL FITNESS TOOLS FOR SUCCESS IN 2010

Living New Year's Resolutions

As we approach the beginning of another New Year, you can turn New Year's Resolutions into Successes with a mental fitness procedure. 

Most people fail in keeping their resolutions because of lack of focus, weak commitment and insufficient will power. 

Successfully, reach your New Year's goals by using The Power Choice from the North Star Mental Fitness Program.  You do not need will power to be successful.

From a mental fitness perspective, there are three necessary steps for success.  

Willingness and Willpower

Do you need willingness, willpower or both in order to achieve your goals?

What is essential for success?  For years we have heard that willpower is necessary to reach our goals.  Willpower has been defined as the "resolution or the ability to control one's behavior" in order to reach a goal.

At MizFit the concept of willingness was suggested as an alternative to having willpower.  Willingness was described as "being willing to do whatever is necessary" in order to reach one's goal.

Willingness is certainly a refreshing concept.  It focuses on one's freedom of choice and attitude.

As I thought about these two concepts, I realized that both will be necessary in order to reach our goals.

While both willingness and willpower are important ingredients for success, both can be difficult to maintain in the pursuit of success.

Mental fitness training strengthens and supports our focus, willingness, and willpower.  Mental fitness training is the foundation providing life support for our willingness and willpower. 

The essence of mental fitness training is to motivate us to take care of ourselves and provide the powerful thought processes to maintain willingness and willpower.

A strong motive and commitment to take care of ourselves is the prerequisite and necessary ingredient for maintaining willingness and willpower.

The North Star Mental Fitness Program provides strategies for taking care of ourselves.  The strategies can be used for achieving any goal or solving any problem.  These strategies can make you strong enough to have sufficient willingness and willpower to achieve any goal.

Please CONTACT ME for more information about the mental fitness program or to purchase the mental fitness program.

Remember, You Live within the Environment Created by Your Choices!

Dr. Hal

Life and Mental Fitness Coach